gothlolita:

im Sorry but you two cant get the marriage. the bible said Adam and Eve not matthew and ashley. come back when youve legally changed your names

(via boobiequake)

deerpong:

bowlingforsoup:

how many haters does it take to change a lightbulb? none. they fear change, even if it can make the world a brighter place.

That was so deep I shit myself

(via raggedyl0ck-winchester)

oswidge:

pick up line: please

(Source: growlithed, via nevrousbreakdance)

sheepishwoes:

what the fuck did i just stumble across

(via tobeymacguire)

shedisenchants:

shedisenchants:

so every year after the juniors finish reading The Great Gatsby my high school english teacher throws a Gatsby party at his huge house and everyone shows up in period clothing and Charlestons to 20s music and my english teacher just wears a suit and stands off to the side staring wistfully out the window the entire night

you guys think I’m joking??

(via sp8nineten)

goddammitfenton:

if you ever feel bad about yourself, just remember this one time in my english class, we were writing horror stories and one of the girls wrote “it was friday the 13th, the night before halloween” for her opening sentence

(via no-one-hears-you-screaming)